DAY 1: Naked Cleaners and Unforeseen Consequences

This is gonna be a lot harder than I thought.  So far I've emailed 6 different ads and none of them have replied.  Today, one ad caught my eye.

"Hey Guys,
Would you like a naked little man helping with those household chores? Contact me for all the details.
Woof!"


Does anybody answer a resounding "YES" to that question?  "Of COURSE I'd like a little naked man helping with my household chores!"  Does the guy just like to do chores naked?  I tend to avoid doing things naked.  Mostly cause I have a weird belly button.

The other confusing thing is the "Woof!" at the end of the post.  As far as I know, "woof" is not a commonly accepted salutation to any sort of letter.

Unforeseen Consequences
The funny thing about all these ads, is that very few of them are seeking men.  There are a lot of , men seeking women, women seeking women, but not many seeking men.  Interesting.  So I obviously have to reach out to people who may not be looking for me.  Anyways, I saw this ad that was Woman seeking Woman:

"Hi Ladies
It is a nice day outside... very excited summer is pretty much here but I find myself indoors watch reruns of Weeds on Netflix.Are you bored too?"

I replied anyways with what I thought was a perfectly acceptable email.

"Hey, I saw your ad and I just wanted to know that I'm hosting a pool party today if you'd like to join.  It's a rooftop pool in an apartment building on Foggy Bottom.  It starts around five, let me know if you want in!"
That's a totally normal email, right?  Her response was this:
"Thanks Zach but no that sounds a bit scary..."
What the fuck?  I'm not supposed to be the creepy one in these exchanges!  I'm supposed to be submitting myself to creepy situations not the other way around!  Oh well, we'll see how this all plays out.